The Truth About "Having It All Together"
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Erica: [00:00:00] Today, I’m pulling back the curtain on the toxic pressure to ‘have it all together’—and why letting go is the real key to healing.
Welcome to Inner Sanctuary Raw Reflection, alignment, and Worthiness. I'm Erica, and this is where we cut through the noise, strip away the pressure to perform and get real about healing and get real about healing and coming home to yourself.
Today I'm talking about something. I know you felt the constant pressure to have it all together. You know that feeling, smiling when you wanna scream, holding it together, because you think if you let it all go, everything will fall apart. But the truth is trying to hold it all together is actually what's keeping you [00:01:00] stuck.
Let's start here. When was the last time you said 'I'm fine', when you were anything but fine.
We've all been taught that strength means holding everything in and looking like we've got our lives perfectly managed.
But here's what science says. When you suppress emotions to look fine, your body reacts as if it's under threat. Studies on emotional suppression show that this coping strategy actually increases sympathetic nervous system activation. Basically, your fight or flight response is turned on.
Cortisol spikes, your muscles tighten, your breath gets shallow, and over time, this state of high alert leads to exhaustion and even [00:02:00] burnout. So if you're feeling tired, unmotivated, or like you can't keep up, it's not because you're weak, it's because your body is tired of performing. It's holding the weight of everything you're not expressing.
Notice where you're holding tension right now. Maybe it's in your jaw, your shoulders, your chest, your lower back. Let yourself breathe into those places for a moment.
You don't have to carry it all alone.
Alignment is when your inner world matches the outer world you show to others. It is the opposite of the fake smile or the, I'm fine that hides your truth.[00:03:00]
Neuroscience tells us that when we live out of alignment, when what we feel and what we express are out of sync, our prefrontal cortex, the part of our brain responsible for decision making becomes overwhelmed. That's why you feel foggy or like you can't think clearly when you're trying too hard to keep it all together.
So what if you allowed yourself to be real, even for a moment? Real doesn't mean falling apart. It means not lying to yourself. And ironically, that's when your nervous system can finally shift into the parasympathetic mode. The state of rest, repair, and healing.
That's when peace starts to come in. Give yourself permission to be honest, even if it's just with yourself. right [00:04:00] now.
You've been told either directly or indirectly that your worth depends on your performance on holding everything together. But here's the truth, your worth isn't earned. It's hardwired into you. You don't have to fix yourself to deserve love, joy, or rest. You don't need to be perfect.
Your body, your mind, your spirit, they all want you to let go because when you do, your body gets to signal that it's safe to heal. You are worthy exactly as you are in this moment.
All right, so we're gonna try a practice today. It's called the Shake and Drop Practice. [00:05:00] Stand with your feet grounded Picture all the weight you've been carrying, sitting on your shoulders. Begin shaking your hands and wrists like you're flicking off water.
Let that movement ripple through your arms, your shoulders. Your hips, your knees loosening tension about 30 seconds.
Now, pause. Let your arms drop and close your eyes. Feel the tingling or heaviness in your body, say to yourself, I don't have to hold it all together. I can let [00:06:00] the ground hold me now.
Notice the places where you've been forcing yourself to hold it together instead of letting yourself be human.
Remember your nervous system craves authenticity, not perfection.
Let the inside and the outside of you match. And know this, you are enough. Even in your messy, undone moments, you always have been.
If this episode spoke to you, take my free inner sanctuary quiz to find out which room of your life is calling for healing, right now.
You get a three minute reset practice that matches where you're at, plus my inner sanctuary mini journal.
Follow me on Instagram at Mind Fusion Coach for more daily truth bombs . And if you love this episode, hit follow [00:07:00] or share it with someone who needs this reminder today.
Remember, letting go is not weakness. It's the beginning of real healing, and I'll see you tomorrow.
Thanks for tuning into Inner Sanctuary RAW. Remember, you don’t need to have it all together to be worthy—your peace begins when you let yourself be real.
